Freefalling
by SeekerFreefall
Summary: G1. Prowl/Jazz, character death. First chapter is kinda morbid, but it gets better, I promise! What happens to the mech left behind when his bonded dies? The Ark quickly discovers that things get a little... wierd. And not in a good way.
1. The Fall

_I've had this on my desktop for a month now, and I've stalled a little on actually writing it. So, I've decided to post what I have to see if feedback helps me get off my tush and finish this thing, darn it. Oh, and also to see if this story makes sense to anyone other than myself. This is only the first chapter, don't worry, there's still a lot to come. Reviews and concrit are always welcome._

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He didn't know who had fired the first shot, the one that knocked Jazz down and left him open for the second, but it didn't really matter. All that mattered was that Prowl was warned enough by the scream in his mind to turn and see the point-blank fusion cannon blast from Megatron that ended it all.

Prime half turned from the subsiding battle when Prowl, standing beside him, dropped to his knees. The rifle fell from his hands and his head sagged, though the Prime had heard no damage being done and saw no wound. He called for Ratchet anyway, shifting his own position to cover the downed tactician until additional help could arrive. The Decepticons were in full retreat now; Prowl's planning had once again helped to assure victory. It wasn't until Sunstreaker approached, carrying the still and blasted form of Jazz that Prime understood Prowl's collapse.

****************

The loss and the sheer pain had sent him reeling, and his first reaction had not been planned, but based on instinct. Grab and hold on. Grab hold of what, he didn't know. With what, he had no idea. His hands were empty, he could see that quite clearly, but he still had the strange sensation that he held something by the very tips of his fingers, and that if he lost his concentration, that intangible _something_ would slip away. It was very illogical, since there was nothing there; he could feel it, but there _was_ nothing to feel, so how could he feel what clearly didn't exist, but could still be felt? His CPU turned those thoughts around and around in his mind, blocking out all other input, shutting down sensors that reported impossible readings that only served to add to the whirl of data.

But he held on anyway.

That might have been the cause for the numbness that settled over his mind and body, the feeling that he wasn't quite... right anymore. It was as if he was sitting a few inches to one side of himself, just slightly out of place, making him confused when he so much as looked up that he became dizzy enough to lose his balance. His internal systems were working overtime trying to compensate for the loss of something that had never physically been there in the first place, and the logic errors were locking up his processors.

But still he held on.

****************

Ratchet sighed and stood, moving over to where Prime was organizing the return to base. He shook his head slightly at the look in Prime's optics.

"He never had a chance, Optimus. From what I can tell, the first shot breached his armor, allowing the fusion blast to blow this damn hole through him. Jazz is tough, and he might have survived even that if the shot hadn't taken out the side of his spark chamber. As it is... all I can say is that it was quick. He probably didn't even have time to feel it."

"No, but Prowl certainly did." Both mechs looked over at the twitching form of the tactician, still kneeling where he had fallen, now staring down at the body of his bonded. As they watched, Prowl slowly reached out and removed the visor from Jazz's face, turning it over and over in his hands. His entire attention seemed focussed on the object, almost ignoring the dead mech before him.

"And what happens to Prowl now, Ratchet? Will we lose him, too?" Prime asked softly, already knowing the answer, but having to ask anyway.

"Since Prowl is still functioning," Prime grunted and shot him a look. Ratchet paused and corrected himself. "Since Prowl has not deactivated yet, there is a chance that he might not. He could even recover somewhat. He wouldn't be the Prowl that we have known, but he would still be functional. That, of course, would be the best case scenario."

"And worst case?"

"Worst case..." Ratched sighed. "Downward spiral of hallucinations and paranoid delusions, insanity and finally death. Usually the results of a broken bonding fall somewhere in between the two extremes, where the surviving bondmate simply decides to stop living." Ratchet moved back towards Prowl. "Don't worry Optimus, when we get back to base, I'll keep an optic on him. If his condition changes, you'll be the first to know."

Prime nodded and reluctantly turned away. The Ark was going to be very different from now on...


	2. The Lost

_Part two, and this is done so fast because it was already mostly finished. Believe it or not, this will not be all doom and gloom, it should actually have some funny bits by the last few chapters. Don't believe me? Read on..._

*************

Prowl looked up in confusion. It was obvious that he was in the medbay, but how had he gotten here? Wasn't there a battle going on? He looked down at the object in his hands - Jazz's visor? Where was Jazz? Or was this an extra? Was Jazz alright? Was he here? He had to be, Prowl could feel the nearness of his spark.

Prowl slipped off the exam table and headed towards Ratchet's office. Was Jazz hiding in there? The feel of his spark got no closer, nor did it fade any. Most confusing..

"Prowl!" A hand gripped his arm, turning him roughly away from the closed door.

"...yes?" He stared in surprise at the scowling CMO, suddenly realising that Ratchet had called his name a few times already. He noticed that the medbay had grown quiet, that the other mechs were all watching him carefully, some with obvious sympathy. Rediculous. He didn't need sympathy, he needed to find Jazz. Prowl looked down at the visor again, ignoring what Ratchet was saying, ignoring the grumpy medic as he was pulled towards his abandoned exam table.

"..and stay there! This is no time for you to be wandering around my medbay, so just stay put! You're not critically wounded, so I'll get to you in-"

"Where is Jazz?"

If Prowl had thought that the medbay had gotten quiet before, it went entirely silent now. He could hear the air cycling through the medic's vents as his optics narrowed and his fists clenched, then relaxed. When he spoke, it was in a clear, calm voice.

"Jazz isn't in here. There is no need for him to be. He's with Wheeljack now. Do you understand, Prowl?" The confused tactition stared back down at the visor in his hands, turning it over and over again. "Do you understand?"

Prowl straightened to his full height and frowned at the medic. "No. No, I do _not_ understand. I do not understand why you say Jazz is with Wheeljack when I can feel him _here_. He's close by, very close by, and I would like to see him. Now." His hands tightened on the precious visor as he felt his fuel pump speed up as panic began to set in. "Where is he, Ratchet? _Where is Jazz_? He's here _somewhere_-"

Ratchet darted forward with a speed very few knew he had, and touched a small tool to the side of Prowl's helm. The mech dropped like a stone, instantly offline, and the medic noticed that even in this state, he still held on to the visor.

*************

A flash of the medbay, of Ratchet, of the medic crouching over him. He was on the floor, and he couldn't move. He couldn't feel anything, he couldn't say anything. His internal comm was out, he wasn't even getting any readings from his systems, nothing. He began to panic and he lost his grip a little, sliding a bit further away, then the light began to recede and the blackness returned. Jazz scrabbled like mad, trying desprately to get away from the darkness, trying to force himself towards the light, towards the warmth that he knew was there, waiting for him, but it resisted his entry.

"Prowl!" Jazz screamed out his bonded's name, and in a flash of brilliance, he was enveloped by the light, welcoming him home.

*************

When Prowl came online, he didn't move. He knew what Ratchet had done to him, and spent a moment coming up with ways to keep it from happening again. He needed to leave the medbay. Jazz wasn't here. It felt like he was, but he wasn't, so Prowl had to find him. Ratchet had said that he was with Wheeljack, and 'Jack's lab was just down the hall. Maybe Jazz really _was_ with Wheeljack, and Prowl just wasn't feeling the distance through the bond correctly.

Yes, that must be it. After all, he had been injured, hadn't he? That was why he couldn't remember the battle ending and the return to the Ark and the details of his own injuries...? Yes, it made perfect sense. He, Prowl, had been injured, and the damage had affected his bond with Jazz somehow, making things feel a little... odd.

Prowl shook his head minutely, then focussed his attention on his doorwing sensors. Performing a scan of the medbay would alert Ratchet that he was awake, but his regular sensors would tell him everything he needed to know without anyone being the wiser. Hmm. Three other mechs lay on berths, all of them offline. One mech, humming monotonously on the far side of the room, was fussing with the medical supplies there.

Perfect. If the mech was filling supplies, he would need to leave the medbay to get to a supply closet, so all Prowl had to do was wait for the right time and he would be able to walk right out.

A thump and the hiss of a door opening told Prowl that Ratchet had finally emerged from his lair, so he held as still as possible, hoping the medic wouldn't notice, wouldn't come over to check...

"Swoop? I'm going to get some energon. Keep on with what you're doing; I'll be back in a few."

Sounds of the doors opening and sliding shut, then more humming. Prowl felt the irrational urge to shout at the mech to hurry up, and spent a moment trying to puzzle out the emotional surge, to the point where he nearly missed Swoop exiting the medbay.

In a flash Prowl was up off his berth - and nearly fell flat on his face.

What...? His balance was off! How? Had his injuries so severe that Ratchet had been unable to fix them? Prowl shook his head again - never mind that now, he had to get out of here! There was only a short window of opportunity here, and if he didn't take it, he'd never get another chance. Prowl staggered from berth to berth on a zig-zagging course, finally reaching the door. He nearly tripped on the door track, and twitched as the closing doors just barely clipped a wing. Odd. Never mind, it wasn't important. He had to find Jazz.

He carefully kept a hand on the wall, straightened himself as if he were not AWOL from medbay, and headed down to Wheeljack's lab.


End file.
